My Adoption Story

I was born on May 1, 1990.

I wasn’t planned. 

I wasn’t hoped for. 

By the world’s definition, I was an accident.

My mom was a strong woman, though. Despite the dirty looks and cruel words of many people, my mom raised me when she wasn’t really finished growing up herself. I had everything I needed. The only thing I didn’t have, though, was a father.

Don’t get me wrong- I had an amazing grandpa and two uncles that spoiled me rotten. I even had a few other men step into my life from time to time that thankfully took care of me and gave me some sort of fatherly attention, but I didn’t ever have a “daddy”.

So when I heard about God who was a loving father, I didn’t really know what that meant. The concept of God as father was as distant as the concept of having a real father. I heard a lot about Him, though. I heard that He was a perfect God who made man to be perfect and we rebelled and were separated from Him. That he sent his son Jesus to the cross die the death we deserved and now we could be forgiven, we could have a personal relationship with Him. And I accepted that sacrifice for my sins when I was young.

I understood the gospel as well as I could at that age. But what I didn’t really grasp was what it meant for him to be my father. That He had adopted me into His family and declared me his child. 

Then when I was eight years old that began to change.

My mom began getting really plugged into a particular Bible study group at church.

Before I knew it, she had a lot of new friends. One friend in particular, though, was around a lot more than the others. His name was Nathan and my mom really liked this friend. In fact, I thought in my eight-year-old mind that they must be best friends because he was with us A LOT. He liked to pay for my mom’s meals and they giggled obnoxiously! What I didn’t realize was that my mom was falling in love with this man and I was starting to as well.

Over the course of the next year I finally started to understand that they were dating. My mom couldn’t get enough of Nathan and neither could I. They were so in love with each other, but even more so they were in love with the Lord.

I got bored of the whole dating thing, though. I wanted this man to put a ring on it! So I started suggesting different ways for him to propose…looking back some of my “romantic” proposal plans weren’t quite as enchanting as I thought they were 15 years ago. Thankfully, he didn’t use any of them.

Nevertheless, one day it finally happened when I least expected it. The three of us were doing a Bible study together when all the sudden Nathan got down on one knee and he asked my mom to marry him (by putting the ring on her right ring finger by mistake). I was so excited! It was what I was waiting for.

But the next thing was what caught me off guard. While my mom inconspicuously slid her ring to the other hand, Nathan remained on his knee and turned to face me. Before I knew it, he was holding my hand. He then pulled a smaller ring out of his pocket, looked at me in the eyes and he said,

 “Jordan, will you be my daughter?”

My mouth dropped. What did he mean, do I want to be his daughter? I thought this was about my mom. I didn’t do anything to deserve this. In fact, I was quite aware at how annoying I was at that age. Why was he asking me this?

Of course I said yes. He slid the ring on my finger and I have worn it every day since.

He didn’t stop there, though. He explained that he wanted to adopt me.

Over the course of the next few weeks, he made sure I understood what exactly adoption would mean. He told me, “Jordan, you aren’t my sort-of daughter. You aren’t my stepdaughter. You are my daughter. My child. And you will always be my child. What is mine is now yours. I will never abandon you. I will always protect you. I’m not going anywhere.”

And over the next few years I finally knew what it meant to have a daddy.

 

Having a daddy taught me I rock at softball, no matter how horrible I played that day.

Having a daddy meant having my own personal math tutor for hours every night.

Having a daddy taught me to mountain bike, rock climb, and repel.

Having a daddy wrongly convinced me Star Wars was cool.

Having a daddy meant date nights full of free manicures and facials.

Having a daddy taught me what a man of God looked like and to never settle for less.

Having a daddy taught me not just to expect respect from boys, but demand it.

Having a daddy taught me that I was worth it.

My dad is my hero. 

I didn’t do ANYTHING to deserve his love, but he gave it.

He chose me.

All the sudden, having the love of an earthly father began to transfer into my view of God. You see, the Bible tells us that we are born separated from God, without a heavenly father. But because of Jesus’ sacrifice, we are able to call God “daddy”. That he literally adopts anyone who would turn from his or her way and accept Jesus’ sacrifice into His family.

We don’t deserve it.

We didn’t do anything to warrant it.

But he CHOOSES us.

Galations 4:4-6 says, “But when the right time came, God sent his Son, born of a woman, subject to the law. God sent him to buy freedom for us who were slaves to the law, so that he could adopt us as his very own children. And because we are his children, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, prompting us to call out, "Abba, Father."

Do you see it? Just as my dad told me 15 years ago, the Lord tells us today.

We aren’t his sort-of children.

He doesn’t ever get so angry that He will leave.

He won’t ever abandon us.

He protects us.

He wants the best for us.

He is our father.

And what is His, is now ours. And what is his? Eternity in his presence…a heavenly inheritance. But not only a heavenly one, but also an abundant life TODAY. In this life.

I pray that your view of your father or lack there of doesn’t prevent you from understanding the daddy that God is. I hope you don’t see God as someone distant, or someone who is angry with you, or someone that has left you, or someone you have to please all the time. Because that just isn’t true.

If you are in Christ, then you have a father. A father that loves you unconditionally.

Yes, he corrects and he certainly disciplines- but he does so out of love. Looking back I am so thankful for the discipline of my dad growing up. It saved me from a lot of heartache in the future. It was for my good.

 So it is with God.

After I got a daddy though, it didn’t take much for me to want to please him, to bring honor to him (I mean he did hang the moon, right?).

I think that is just how we are to follow God as Christians. Not out of obligation or fear. But out of an overflow of thankfulness. It is out of our love for Him that we seek to bring Him glory. We can trust that He truly has our best interests in mind. He is our daddy.

I share this to not only encourage someone reading to get a fuller grasp of who God is, but also to encourage Christians to live out the Gospel in the same way. 

If you are in Christ and considering adopting, I say DO IT. 

I can’t think of a better way to scream the Gospel then doing exactly was done for us through Jesus. 

I sure did get the message loud and clear.

The goal of me sharing my story is not to focus my family, but the God I came to know through my experience and what I learned about adoption. I do want to share, though, how blessed I am to not only have an amazing mom and dad, but also my birth father who I have had the amazing time getting to know the last few years. I am so lucky to have the huge family I do :).